Saturday, September 4, 2010

Hey lookit what I found!

Dusty here, remember me? I was the other out of shape, slightly awkard Nerdking on the Pop Media Primecast. Since the show rode into the bittersweet sunset, I've been wading through a murky swamp filled with overbearing responsibility that was made up of 2 parts part-time jobs, 1 part college courses and 3 parts maintianing social life. Well one of those jobs rode into its own chaotic sunflare a few weeks back, I'm wrapping up my self-appointed sentence at Community College in December, and one part of that social life is leaving for the military in a few weeks. So needless to say I now have more time to focus on what was a recurring theme for me throughout the Primecast's golden run, evolving into an established writer.

Dom suggested I pool some of my ideas on this Bloggy-thingy (Scott Pilgrim reference) so you folks can critique and/or instigate a flame war against them. I see he's been busy with his own works, so it looks like I've got some catching up to do. First up I'm going to offer a synopsis of a script I worked on during the show's run. Its about a British metal band as it tours across Eurasia to promote its nomination for induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, instead of their career long rivals. Here is an excerpt of The Ballistacrats.

Black. The crowd roars. Over the loudspeaker an announcer yells, "Alright Moscow we want you to go fucking nuts as we bring you the metallic gods...the sirens of solos...the demigods of distortion...the sophisticated savagery that is, The Ballistacrats!" Fade in; panning over the audience leading to a large stage, it fires pyrotechnics like a warship as ERNIE V. pounds on his drums. A soothing bass groove, followed by a screeching guitar riff mix in as SONNY PAUL and PERRY LOU rise from the stage floor. A low growl summons a ring of fire at center stage and JACQUES LeRAGE jumps out of the ring in a furious yell as the band leads into its biggest hit to date, "Spread Eagle."

Security frantically barricades fans from rushing the stage. One woman manages to break free and tackles Sonny. She introduces herself as AMANDA, and claims to be his biggest fan. He jokes, "Sorry babe, but she's my biggest fan." He points out a rather large hambeast of a woman covered in tattoos and piercings screaming at the top of her lungs. Amanda laughs and lunges at Sonny's face before he stops her, asking to delay the impromtu meet and greet until after show, he needs to return to the song. She enthusiastically nods and trots backstage in a giddy frenzy. The rest of the concert becomes lost in a haze of sex, drugs and rock and roll.

Back at the band's tour bus, a television set plays an MTV News segment. Reporter SWAY reports that the upcoming Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction Ceremony will be postponed until the Nomination Comittee can decide on who takes the final spot of this year's induction class, which include Kiss, Thin Lizzy, Lodon Wainwright and in a surprise decision, Zydeco act Wayne Toups. The final spot is currently being debated over two legendary metal acts, The Ballistacrats and their career long rivals, Jack Union.

At the very utterance of that name Ernie V. hurls one of his drumsticks at the television, breaking it. He exclaims as he rises from a chair, "Jack Union? Fuck those wankers!" The rest of the band agrees, except for Sonny, who is locking lips with the groupie from earlier. They stop for a moment so Sonny can assure Ernie V. that he shouldn't worry. "If the band doesn't make the cut, they're is always next year." Ernie V. turns and directs his anger at Sonny by throwing his other drumstick at him. Sonny in a panic grabs Amanda ans shields himself, the drumstick hitting her in the eye. She slaps Sonny and storms out of the bus, crossing paths with SAUL McGUINNESS, the band's manager. He sees her storm out, sighs and enters the bus.

So this is a bit of the beginning. It basically sets the plot in place and establishes the cast of characters, both protag and antag. This is the most recent draft of the story and I'll add more when I happen again on this site. Hope you enjoy it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.